I have a 17 year old who absolutely will not co-operate with his parents or teachers. He's been given direction and still he won't complete his work. He consistently awol from classes and even when confronted he continues his bad habits. I need advice.How can a parent get a teenager to study and complete their homework?
Well, you can lead the donkey to water- but short of drownding him you can't make him drink. You can however, make life much less comfortable until he does conform to expectations. Does he have a cell phone? Does he have a computer? Internet? Phone? Car keys? Car? A social life?
It might be a hardship, but you can escort his tail end to school and even to class. Take a day off and actually get permission to go to class with him. Feed him a peanut butter sandwich for supper, and tell him it's to make up for the lost wages for not working that day. And if he skips again, you will repeat the embarassment of having a parent accompany him to class.
Remind him the free ride on parental hides doesn't last forever. All those little incidentals that make his life enjoyable are paid for by somebody else's labor- and if needbe, that support can end at 18. Then if he decides starving is an attractive option, it is his decision as an adult. Meantime, your dime, your rules. He plays by the rules, life is worth living. He doesn't, and life gets ugly. If he thinks it's ugly now, tell him to just wait a bit. Nobody has much use for a lazy and ignorant 18 year old. Minimum wage is a starvation wage, and without an education there's not much else.
Even if he walks, eventually he will come around- most of them do. It just takes some of them a little longer to mature and wise up. It isn't being mean to tell them how life works, and it isn't mean to let him hit his duff to learn. Good luck, and take your vitamins because you are going to need endurance to weather this one out.How can a parent get a teenager to study and complete their homework?
LOL im 13 and I do my homework. Its because I am from India and I want to help this nation when I grow up and the world. Me
I do my homework because I did not travel 12,000 miles to
get F,s.You simply have to remind him about life and how he might be unsuccesfull if he does not do well in school. I mean
everything he does or does not will affect whether or not he lives
in a mansion or not. Just remind him that what he does not do now affects his future.Its what my parents do.It just pushes me
to work harder if I ever find myself procrastinating. OH NO
IM PROCRASTINATING NOW!!
He is no longer of an age when he is obliged to be at school. Allow him to make a choice; work or school and if he chooses to study allow him to choose where and what to study. I think that it is very important that he makes this choice. As a teacher I see too many students doing what their parents think they should. This is always a mistake.
However, I think you must link any allowance you pay him to his effort at studying (though not his attainment)
Hhmm... I wonder who's the parent here, him or you? He's almost 18 give him an ultimatum.... shape up or ship out! You need to give him a reality check in the worst case scenario. Or just kick his a.s.s.
This is a situation for tough love.
He needs to realize that while he lives at home and until he is finished with school your expectations of him are to go to school and succeed. He needs his education in order to succeed. HS dropouts make a million dollars less than their HS Collegial peers.
Is there something going on? Drugs, girlfriend, issues at home, dealing that are keeping him out of school ? (Sorry for the yucky list , but as parents you have to consider any and everything!) Can you reason with him and say that no school no money, or car, or cell phone or phone privileges?
Too bad teenagers don't come with a manual.
MMMMMM. talk to a counseller and get help! :)
sit him down and ask him what is the problem....
if he has valid reasons, then try to work it out with him....otherwise take away the car, phone, and other things he enjoys and stick to it until he shapes up....you also might remind him he will have to take the same grade level over again and students and friends will tease him...[he might be involved with drugs.....check it out
give him incentives.like if he finishes his maths work,then he gets to watch a movie or extra pocket money.this will encourage him to study.
There has to be consequences when they skip school. You can take away their cell phone, computer, etc. This will only work if you are consistent, and you never 'give them a second chance'. Also, you can be a part of their studying. Sit down with them and do not let them leave the table until you have gone over their homework with them. Remember, there are consquences if they do not show their completed homework each night. also, have a meeting with their teacher, and let her know of your intended plans. Make sure that she will notify you of any changes in your child, both good and bad. I really think you should read a Dr. Phil book, he can give great, easy to understand, and concise advice. Best of Luck !!
I had the same problem a few years back. But it wasnt with my child but my little brother. I talked to him about many things including responsibilities and so on and so fort. What he needed was a talk and made him anderstand that everyone has his own things to do. I asked him to work with me and to do somethng together. Some teenagers sometimes need guidance. So guide him or her to what he likes and dislikes.
ya...u can give him the secret of life i.e. study or do jobs like washing clothes,etc.
As i read other answers which suggested tht u shld close all means of enjoyement for him but i don't agree with it.the boy will become worse frm bas and worst.....so i think u can just make him know wht studying is.....if this does not work than e-mail me about wht problem he has so he is not studying....we can solve tht prb.My id is email@example.com
I hate to have to say this, but nothing's better than a good 'ol beating. And by that I don't literally mean a beating but you know what I mean. It doesn't matter if they're 7 or 17. You're the parent. They're the child. You have authority. They don't. Might seem a little mean or maybe physical discipline isn't your style. But I'll tell you this, violence has solved more issues than anything else in history. When I stepped out of line, I got a belt to the, well, you know. And guess what? I never stepped out of line again.
get his clothes and put them in a box and tell him to take them with him, and never come back.
after a few days in the streets, he might reconsider school and studying.
or just don't give him anything to eat or wash his clothes nothing make him work for it since he refuses to act as a son should, then charge him rent, he can pay with chores all day 8 hours of work i'm sure he will rather go to school then pay rent, pay for food, pay for cable, pay for laundry pay for having his room clean by someone else, pay for the water and electricity. I SAY CHARGE THE LIVING CRAP OUT OF HIM.
I BET HE WILL THINK ABOUT IT. NOT ONLY THAT BUT WHEN HE DOES PAY STILL REMIND HIM THAT BECAUSE HIS YOUR SON AND IS YOUR HOUSE HE CAN'T BRING ANYONE AT HOME WITH YOU BEING IN THE HOUSE. .
AND SO ON, MAKE RULES AND STICK TO THEM. IF ALL ELSE FAIL PAY SOMEONE TO KICK HIS *** ROYALLY. A FEW BROKEN BONES MIGHT HUMBLE HIM.
Have the parent reward hime for getting good grades on the report crad with money or something desired.
No study, no money.
No homework, no money.
Bad habits, no money.
No money, no money, no money.............